Our international staff of writers have been attending music festivals around the globe collectively for decades. We’ve had our share of mishaps and fuckups – along with some unforgettably great times. We took our darkest war stories and most epic festival experiences, and culled them all together to make sure you have a kickass time in the RockRevolt™ Magazine “NO BULLSHIT MUSIC FESTIVAL SURVIVAL GUIDE 101!”
Before you even leave the house MAKE SURE YOU HAVE:
- Your tickets. No we’re not fucking kidding. It’s not funny, dammit.
- Your friends that are riding with you. No we’re not kidding. It’s not funny, dammit.
- Without sounding like your mom: wallet (with ID, insurance cards, debit cards, cash), phone, car charger, solar charger (more on that) and all, or at least most, of the items in the slideshow of excellence we’ve created for you (below).
- Festivals are notorious for bad cell coverage (some carriers are better than others). Have everyone in your crew’s cell number WRITTEN DOWN on a piece of paper in your wallet. Why? Do you know everyone’s number by heart? If you don’t and someone is nice enough to lend you their working phone to call them…you’re fucked. You’ve got no one to call.
- In case said cell is working, download the festival’s app on your phone. They have updated set times, maps, important info and so much other cool stuff.
When you arrive at the Festival:
- WRITE DOWN WHERE THE FUCK YOU PARKED! You swear (and your bff swears, and everyone in the GD car SWEARS) that you and all of them are going to remember. You won’t. Trust us.
- Make sure you hide any valuables and have all of the shit listed above and YOUR KEYS IN YOUR MF HAND BEFORE YOU LOCK YOUR CAR! No we’re not kidding. It’s not funny, dammit.
- Once inside the festival, everybody agree on a designated “FFM” (Fuckin Find Me) spot – where if you get separated, you can all meet up there as a last attempt.
It’s all good, though! Have no fear, kids! There are lots of ways to stay connected and have a blast! Just follow the RockRevolt™Magazine’s NO BULLSHIT MUSIC FESTIVAL SURVIVAL GUIDE 101:
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OTHER MISCELLANEOUS “STUFF”:
- Baby wipes, toilet paper or kleenex. Late in the day, those porta-potties have nothing but shit and piss and little to help you contribute. Baby wipes are good for anything from porta-potty business to cleaning your hands before/after eating to wiping that different colored lipstick off your face (yeah…we’re talking to YOU!)
- Gum, mints, folding toothbrush/travel-sized toothpaste and deodorant. No one likes stinky breath or BO for fucks sake! No, we do not want to smell the corndog you ate for lunch as you scream”THIS FUCKING ROCKS!!!” with your raised-fist exposing your BO-laden-pit-o-doom our faces. Really…we don’t.
- If you go into it already knowing the weather is rainy: wear rain boots and bring that poncho!
- Camera condom – for rainy weather. They are pretty cheap at camera store. A plastic bag and rubberband will work in a pinch. We know we already mentioned this, but bring a regular condom – because, yeah – you don’t want to pick up more “swag” than you intended. Plastic bag and rubberband will NOT work in a pinch in this scenario.
- Earplugs. Ok…maybe not, but just in case you get some weird ringing in your ears or something. They don’t take up much space. Just do it.
- Finally, when you’re back in the car–dry shoes, socks, undies and t-shirt.
- Hand sanitizer. There is not enough hand sanitizer in the world at a music festival. Trust us. Especially if you’re camping.
If you’re camping then stay tuned…because that’s an entirely different type of survival guide!
WHERE TO BUY:
WALKIE TALKIES (this is just an example – check around – and they carry at WalMart, RadioShack, etc. as well)
READY-MADE “Ultimate Festival Kit” (has a lot of the basics all in one nifty bag)
By: Alice Roques and Valerie King / Co-Founders and Editors of RRM!
Photos: Found on different festival sites and Google images. If these are your images and would like proper photo credit, please email either alice@ or val@rockrevoltmagazine.com and we’ll give you your props or remove. Thanks!
